Baldur’s Gate 3 Has Some of the Best Pickup Lines I’ve Ever Heard (and Some of the Thirstiest)

Romance in video games is obviously not a new feature. It hit the mainstream with the original Baldur’s Gate games back in the late 90s (unless you count Leisure Suit Larry—ergh), while the likes of Cyberpunk 2023 and The Witcher 3 give players more than a taste of some lovin’. In Baldur’s Gate 3, however, the level of flirty carrying-on has been given a giant dose of thirst and most of us aren’t complaining (though some, like our own Matt and Rob, certainly are).

You only have to look on places like Twitter (sorry, X) and TikTok to witness people falling over themselves when characters like fiery Karlach or egotistic Astarion whisper sweet nothings in their ears with some of the steamiest pickup lines that I’ve ever heard in a game – and I’m so here for it.

I’ve played Baldur’s Gate 3 for around 90 hours so far, and the more I progress, the steamier it gets.

Now before we get into this, I, of course, know that getting your rocks off with some fantasy characters isn’t what makes a game good, and it can very easily come across as quite sleazy and unneeded, especially when it doesn’t serve a purpose other than getting the player hot and bothered. But in BG3, these juicy interactions do pay off by allowing players to get to know their companions which in turn gets them to open up to you and divulge their past in a much deeper way than a standard boring conversation.

Getting Hot Round The Campfire

This also makes for more meaningful campfire talks and come on, who wouldn’t want the flames of desire to heat them through the long, cold nights? Feasting on a pear or dried sausage only goes so far—it gets lonely in the Forgotten Realms, you know!

I’ve played Baldur’s Gate 3 for around 90 hours so far, and the more I progress, the steamier it gets. One of my personal favorite companions for filthy pickup lines has to be the too-hot-to-handle Karlach. This wild and fierce Tiefling Barbarian hasn’t been able to touch anyone without burning them in a long time, which absolutely adds depth to her evident libidinous frustration, which culminates when she told me around the campfire: “Gods, I want to ride you ’til you see stars”.

I also heard her whisper that she’d “come and find me when the others had gone to bed” – Little devil! But Karlach isn’t all lust and no trousers, she has an incredibly tender side and just wants hugs, and needs to be loved, just like everybody else does (bonus point for anyone who gets the Smiths reference).

Another incredibly funny and flirtatious character is Astarion. Once you get his sadistic and egotistic exterior out of the way, his pickup lines would leave any hot-blooded player weak at the knees. Some of my all-time deliciously thirsty pickup lines from this self-assured vampire are: “Here’s my little treat with their cheeks all flushed. You will come to my bed tonight, won’t you?” and “Every part of your perfect body whispers temptation, it’s as if the gods made you just to ruin me”. It’s little wonder why social media is absolutely littered with Astarion memes and gameplay clips when he produces such jam-packed and unapologetic flirts.

After I eventually found a way inside the untrusting heart and initially enigmatic Shadowheart, she also joined the randy crew. In one conversation I had with her about hunting for a cure, she ended our talk with “Try not to dream about tying me up”. And let’s not even start on Lae’zel’s overflowing thirst cup by demanding that I “Summit” to her and her unashamed confession that my scent alone is enough to make her neck sweat and her hair stand on end. Queue Barry White, that’s what I say to that.

As much as Baldur’s Gate 3 loves to horn it up—and it does so better than any game I’ve experienced—these steamy encounters not only offer some funny tongue-in-cheek and blushing moments but also respite from the daily doom and gloom of so much that goes on around us. If such delightful and charming moments in games not only help cheer us all up but also serve a meaningful purpose to the narrative, I’ll most certainly raise a tankard of beer to that.